Closer to 40


With my 38th birthday coming up in May, I find myself looking forward to 40. I hear great things about the 40’s. The thing that most intrigues me, is the prospect of coming into my own. The freedom to be who I am and, not apologize for it. I feel like it’s slowly beginning already. There are things that happen to me now, that I feel are not the end of the world. Back in my 20’s and early 30’s these same things would bother me. For example,in the past, family members and friends alike, had decided for some unspoken reason to cease communication with me. Never giving an explanation. Years ago that would have bothered me. The family members that did this, then realized how wrong they were, and made amends. Of course, I welcomed them back and didn’t hold a grudge. That was the old me. These same family members decided to do this same thing that I speak of, once again. This time around, I said “To hell with this!” I don’t care why, one day they speak to me then the next day they don’t. Screw em’. I’m not wasting anytime on people who do this. This goes double for people not related to me. If it makes them happier not to deal with me, then I’m glad they’re gone. More power to them, I guess they showed me! :D…. It’s such a refreshing change, to have matured to a point where, I don’t even give it much thought. The older I get, the less patience I have for petty nonsense. I speak of it now, to acknowledge the growth that has taken place. Slowly, but surely, those that are not conducive to my personal growth, are being weeded out. These were the same people, I thought would be in my life for the long haul.  The fact that I am now estranged with this people, is a testament to my growth. In me carrying on with my life, without falling to pieces, I congratulate myself.

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