Back In The Saddle Again


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Hello! I’m finally back after a very long break. Was off taking care of life business. I normally try to keep this blog for personal stuff but in this case, business and personal are hand in hand. Here’s what I blogged about over on my business blog:

After my second release, Kindred Spirits, I set out to become a homeowner. That was a little over 2 years ago. I took a break from writing to concentrate on my new goal. By January 2015 I had accomplished my goal. I’m proud to say that I am a first-time homeowner.  That should have been cause for great celebration. My life went downhill from there.Long story short, it took a year to move  my daycare business from my old residence to the new one.

Running a daycare is what I do for my “day job.” Getting registered in my new home took so much longer than I thought it would.  I basically suffered financially the entire year of 2015. I had to take on an extra job so there was absolutely no writing getting done.  In the middle of December 2015 I finally became  registered to run a daycare again. Now to build up my clientele in my new home. Another challenge but I know it will work itself out in no time.

All this to say that things are starting to calm down in my life. I started the new year dusting off my blogs and breathing life back into my Facebook page. I want to get back to social networking again. I miss tweeting, pinning and Instagraming I’ve been jotting down story ideas and trying my hand at poetry. I figured that would be a good outlet for the many emotions I’ve experienced the past few years. I hope you’ll rejoin the journey with me.  I’m slowly getting back in the saddle again :)


Lesson Learned


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I’m finally able to come here and express myself without tears blurring my vision.  Right before Christmas I lost my big sister. It was sudden. It was quick. We didn’t know she was so ill until she went into the hospital and passed away three days later. When she first went into the hospital, I had hope. I told myself that everything would be fine.  The day after she was admitted, it was critical but in my head this was a speed bump that she would recover from. On the third day, I received a call from my mother urging me to get down to the hospital because my sister didn’t have much time. She wasn’t expected to make it through the night.

I don’t like seeing people on the brink of death. I rather remember them in happier times and full of life. But sometimes we have to put our own shit aside. I’m so glad I did. I think, no, I’m certain I would have regretted not going to see my sister. I arrived at the hospital to see my zany and vibrant sister hooked up to machines that kept her alive–if you can call it that. My heart broke. I wept at her bedside for so many reasons.

I wept because she had such a rough life and was finally finding peace and happiness. I wept because we had lost contact for a period of time and I had just gotten her back. I wept because she was such a lively person with a zest for life even when it had been cruel to her, and now she was slipping away. Machines were keeping her alive and I thought, “this is so cruel.” I took her hand. I know she felt us all surrounding her. I wanted her to know that it was okay to let go.

She didn’t deserve to remain in the state she was in. Her heart was weakening. She was removed from the machines the next day. I opted not to be present for that moment. I had already said my goodbyes and would not have been okay with witnessing her last breath.

It’s only been a few weeks. My heart aches everyday. I go through moments of normalcy with her passing always looming in the background. I go on with everyday chores with that black cloud in the distance. My sister lived about two hours away from me so we didn’t get together very often. But I took comfort in just knowing that she was there. Even when we lost contact, just knowing that she was out there made me feel less lonely. Now I feel so alone. It’s weird because our papa is a rolling stone.  I have at least 8 more siblings out there. (A post for another day)

I don’t know my other siblings, I only know of them. I was raised with my sister for the first few years of my life. We share the same father but have different mothers. My mother cared for her since she was very young. My mother was the only mother my sister ever knew. Our parents divorced and my father split us up. I stayed with my mother and was raised as an only child. But I always knew that wasn’t the case. I had a painfully lonely childhood but the fact that my sister existed always made me feel better. And now she’s gone.

I’ve gone through periods of time when I lost my sister, but we always found our way back to each other. The fact that I’ve lost her for good has left such a void in my life. I’m back to that painfully lonely place. I know there are pieces of me, in the form of other siblings, floating around out there, but none of them share the bond I had with my sister.

These past few weeks have been eye-opening and chock-full of life lessons that I’m not sure I was ready to learn. (Again, a post for another day) I grieve for all the future moments that were taken away from us. I regret letting petty things get in the way of spending what time I had left with my sister. Because of my deep dislike for another family member I was cheated out of the last moments of quality time with my sister. I can never get those moments back because I chose to distance myself from the group the last few times she visited. All because I was avoiding that one other person. Lesson learned.

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Front cover of the card my sister gave me on my last birthday.

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Interior of birthday card. This says it all.


Inquiring Minds Want to Know


Kindred Spirits--release date 10/31/13

Kindred Spirits–release date 10/31/13

So I’ve published my second book and of course I’m little nervous about how it will be received.  I joke about how people will think I’m utterly mad after having read the book. I’m not too concerned with that because I think we’re all a little crazy :)! I do, however, worry about people being cross with me for what I’ve done to a sacred topic.  I believe people refer to this as, blasphemy.  *Dun dun dunnn… Thunder clap*

I’m not heavily into religion but I do respect everyone’s beliefs and have always had the opinion that no one is right and no one is wrong. Is blasphemy still a big deal? I’m not being sarcastic or careless when I ask. I’m genuinely curious. As I’ve stated, I’m not a very religious person so I don’t know.  So, tell me, does it turn you off from an author’s future work if they’ve blasphemed? Inquiring minds want to know.


Kindred Spirits- Extended Trailer


Get a glimpse into my short story colletion, Kindred Spirits. Due to be released just in time for Halloween 2013.


Kindred Spirits


A quick teaser to my upcoming short story collection. Due out Halloween 2013


Life Gift Registry


Whether you’re getting married, moving into a new place or about to have your first baby, you go to your favorite store and what do you do? You register, that’s what. You go through the store adding things on a list that you would love to have. It takes the guess-work out of what people should buy for you to mark the special occasion. Some love these gift registries and some dislike them. But there’s no denying the popularity of said service.

After you’ve selected everything your heart desires, people are more than happy (We’d like to think :) ) to run out and purchase these things for you. Those near and dear to you hurry to grab those big-ticket items as if it’s some indication of their awesomeness. The satisfaction they derive from sitting at your bridal shower or house-warming party when you’re opening the gifts–hey, it’s just what you wanted!

Now imagine if you could do that for life, in general. No special occasion, just being able to put what you most desire on a list and people clamoring at the chance to oblige. How awesome would that be? I’m not suggesting here that others are responsible for providing you with things you should be attaining for yourself.  This is just a whimsical little post so don’t shoot me down.

One of the things I’d put on  my list would be, endless opportunities to travel. It’s probably my favorite thing to do. What would you put on your Life Gift Registry?


Upcoming Release–Halloween 2013


Yesterday I revealed the cover to my upcoming release titled, Kindred Spirits. It’s a  short story collection. There’s bloody murder, family secrets, hauntings, insanity and more. I got so excited about the cover so I wanted to share it. Here it is designed by Hi-Rise Visions who did a fantastic job!

Kindred Spirits--release date 10/31/13

Kindred Spirits–release date 10/31/13

 


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